December 2010
I think the new literary trend is to sound really astounded and express the inexpressible by just not expressing.
i think irony is no longer worth it, guys. i don’t even know myself anymore.
i am wearing a sweater with stripes, and i don’t know what it means. i am finding it difficult to remember to breathe. my eyes pain slightly on the inside whites, between the pupils and the lacrimal caruncles, and i can feel a slight need for watering begin around the edges of my eyelids.
i believe in...
eff eff.
some motherfucking shit went down.
“ScarJo breaks up with her beau and NatPo gets knocked up. When the Flying...”
– Celebritology 2.0 - Natalie Portman engaged and pregnant
Chains I Hate
The Cheesecake Factory
Westfield
Applebee’s
The American obsession with the rustic. Fiction was so much better when it was 80% dialogue.
verbal tics i have had at one point or another
this is a true story that i am telling you
true facts
truefax
truefax in a hat
the best!
put on your sunday best.
go murderin’.
it’s the state mint of the great mint in doublemint gum!
emma stone as gwen stacy is pretty perfect. andrew garfield as spider-man is not really a strong fit, but he’s a talented actor, so i’m sure he’ll pull it off.
tobey maguire was great in the first film, but he really overdid the sensitive stammering in the sequels.
myopic. presbyopic.
sebaceous.
hipster in suburban gear.
toot it and boot it.
Things That Other People Seem to Be Really Into...
cheesecake
cupcakes
cookies
baked goods in general
(to be continued)
hipster fucks dine well tonight.
“It is a great relief in any event that “The Station Agent” is not...”
– The Station Agent :: rogerebert.com :: Reviews
“I wear my shades at night so I can look in the abyss.”
– Kid Cudi, “MANIAC (feat. Cage & St. Vincent)
sometimes i can literally feel myself getting smarter, and it’s awesome.
other times, i don’t notice it, but see something i’ve just written or done and realise i must have gotten smarter in order to have done it that way.
and most times i feel like my brain has not moved in ages, like it is an old piece of flesh sitting in my skull going nowhere, bleeding down.
i wish i’d known about pbzip2 before i ran a command to bzip2 a shitload of files.
this is the sort of thing i’d like to convey to the world but which i don’t think the world is interested in knowing. hence, here.
the wonderful theatrics of explosions.
i’m tired of characters’ motivations coming from their daddy issues.
cf. tony stark.
scarlett johansson is the eternal ingenue trying to be something more — she’s got artfulness but no bite, too easily satisfied with the trappings of feeling.
“What are the differences between Mark Zuckerberg and me? I give private...”
– Julian Assange on SNL (via kateoplis) Well, this is simplistic ,but entertaining.
1: Do you never say no?
2: He can never be raped!
let me get my hands on your memory glands.
(is what i heard, incorrectly)
(i like my version better)
“Oh yeah, Elisabeth Moss’ eyes are more glunky.”
J: soulmates can be casual
J: dude
me: ...dude what
me: oh nvm it was an ending dude, not a standalone dude
YouTube comments are okay, but for true well-meaning cluelessness, the Facebook Engineering blog comments take the cake.
one more pro-mac thing: they use their meta keys (ctrl, alt/option, cmd) very intelligently, whereas windows has the same number of meta keys (with the windows key in lieu of the cmd key) but doesn’t really make any useful keyboard shortcuts out of it.
two particular things i like:
by using cmd as the meta key for most common operations (cut, copy, new, open, close, quit), the ctrl gets...
i need more methods to communicate with other people so each one develops its own nuanced place in the pantheon of communication methods, and then, finally, i will know exactly what someone thinks of me and wants from me when they use X method of communication.
they asked you for help on their homework? well, did they message you on social networking site A or social networking integration in...
make sure you know who’s putting on whom.
me: Have you ever read Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day?
J: No. What's it about?
me: A kid who has a really bad day.
pouring upwards.
Grey wolf. Otter. Would I have been glib enough?
Kids on leashes with backpacks. Painting the slaves’ chains.
Childlike states.
The clarifying effects of walking home drunk. Conversations echoing off walls, surrounding, not there. Still cars. Buzz past. And imbalance. Perpetual imbalance. Attention catching. Stark. Damp. Friends, left behind to venture forth, in a daring bet that you will make it home. A catch in your throat, and when you yourself stomp down on a loose main — meters jolting you loose, mumbles sickening,...
red flowers
in patterns.
Figure it out,
sun ditch it in doubt,
one writch of it out,
make it worth your while and study on it.
3am burritos.
6pm foie gras.
Make shit happen, you motherfuckers.
Sycophantic green ladies.
“Last time I went to Matrix, there was a caveman dancing, and I got molested by a...”
C: That place is actually great to have a birthday party if you're a girl because the Italian guys will dance for you and take off their shirts.
me: ...You're looking straight into my eyes, as if out of the five of us here at the table, this information is most relevant to me.
Gay gods complimenting each other’s worlds.
“Ohmygosh, I love your desert! Who would have thought of putting so much SAND together!”
get your dick sucked in summer; get your boobies worked in winter.